Domesticated Diva

When a man leaves a woman

Three years ago, my ex-husband left me after 14 years of being together, and 10 years of marriage. He walked out on me and my family. He left behind a wonderful son (11), and two beautiful daughters ages 4 and 1. He also walked out on a daughter he never met. The one I was carrying. I was just 7.5 months pregnant when he left.

When I look back at this time in my life, it was tough but definitely wasn’t the toughest I had ever been through. At that moment it was like my life was going to end. Of course it didn’t. I had to find strength to go on for my kids sakes. They were my world and they meant everything to me. I love and adored them. My ex-husband surprised me and shocked me, but he felt that we came from two different cultures and since I wasn’t willing to live his culture, he wasn’t willing to live mine. So he left. He really did me a favor.

Today after 3 years, I filed for divorce. In these three years we have had no intimate contact, and actually lost those feelings over time. I can’t say it’s been 3 years that I haven’t wanted my soon to be ex-husband, but it’s been a long time. It’s been over 2 years. I went through a healing process where I had to grieve and then I started to hate him. Now we are just good friends for the kids sakes. We do actually get a long pretty good. I still feel I know him better than anyone does. He knows that is the truth. He still calls me for EVERYTHING. People think it’s crazy that I do things for him still.. but it’s a give and take situation. We are friends for our kids sakes.

My boyfriend is wonderful about our relationship. He totally understands it and actually encourages it. He really is not jealous in the least bit, and will invite him into our home any time. He has gone out of his way on MANY occasions to extend his hand to my soon to be ex-husband. This is the way I hope it stays forever. These are two men in my life that I need. I need my ex, for my kids, and I need my boyfriend cause he’s just a wonderful guy. I am very thankful for them both.

I wish more people could get a long as well. Trust me things aren’t always honky doory but usually they are. Nine times out of 10 they are great!

Cleaning…Christmas Cleaning

Now’s the time to run around the house and declutter.  Time to get ready for Christmas! Clean everything from top to bottom.  This will really help for when you start to decorate for the Holidays.  Don’t forget the kids toys.. toss out as much as you can, remember Santa will just be bringing more.  Clean them out!

Toss everything and anything you can imagine.  You will be so happy when your done.  I promise!

Great Contest!

My friend is having an awesome contest that I just had to share and include a link to.   You have to check it out especially if you are a candle freak like me! I love candles.  I’ve never tried the Mia Bella Candles, but I really am looking forward to trying them.  I hope I win!

http://www.my-junk-drawer.com/2008/11/win-mia-bella-products-in-my-first-ever.html

Tell her, Jen sent you.. *Smile*

Coffee Maker looking a little Dingy?

Is your coffee maker looking a little discolored? Vinegar is your bestfriend! 1 part vinegar to two parts water, and actualy let it go through an entire brew cycle.  If you’ve never done it you might want to do it like 3 times the first time! It’s a great tip, trust me! It will clean out our maker and you’ll be makingfresher tasting coffee immediatey.

This domesticated diva is a GEEKY ONE

I don’t know how many readers of mine are geeky like me.  I feel like anyone who reads my stuff probably knows the same information, and I feel compelled to share the cool stuff I find with everyone I know.  So maybe this doesn’t belong in this blog, but remember who’s behind this blog… A geek herself.. lol.. A computer network geek! Worked in the field for many, many years. Once a computer Geek always a computer geek.

The pc-libary.com is an amazing site when you can’t seem to figure out an error message or what port it’s pointing to.  I kept getting an error message pointing tcp udp port 9200. I searched and searched till I realized that PC-library is the place to go. It’s a great directory of all the corresponding ports, the error messages, etc. This site is any geeks dream. It can even tell you what software might be using what port! Now thats exactly what I need!!

We may be intelligent with computers and stuff, but we don’t know everything. So with more sites like pc-library at our fingertips the faster we can get our jobs done too! I definitely give this site two thumbs up.

Cleaning bird cages

I’m not sure if I’ve shared on this blog, but I am a big birdlover.  Birds are my babies.  I have a Sun Conure named Mimi, and a 24 year old African Gray named Sammy.  They are my loves.  Actually Sammy is Harry’s bird, but I tell Harry that I’m only with him for Sammy.  I told him if we were to ever break up, I’d HAVE to bring Sammy with me.  lol..

The only thing I don’t like about birds is cleaning their cages.  Sammy is a big bird, so he’s got a big cage.  It’s a pain to clean it, but what I do is get out the vacuum, newspaper, old rag, and a basin of soapy water.  I put Sammy out on his playground and I get to work..Takes 5 minutes.  I take a rag and put it in the soapy basin and wring it out.  I would then wipe down the whole cage.  For tough areas like under his perch I will just soak it a little more.. more soap and water in that area.  Then put that back into the basin, grab the newspaper and garbage out of the bottom of the cage.  (Tray pulls out on all birdcages) Wrap it up, toss it in the garbage, and then I wash that out with the rag.

I then go and get the vacuum the floor, and take the reach part of the vacuum and vacuum out the corners of the cages that I couldn’t get with the rag.  I also vacuum all this toys in his cage, and switch them out monthly.  I know this seems like a lot.. but I’m done.. I throw down a thin layer of newspaper into the bottom of the now air dried tray, and put sammy back in his nice clean cage.  I grab his dishes and throw them into the basin of water and head off to the kitchen where I drop off the bowls. And head to the bathroom to dump the water and clean out the basin.  I would replace the bowls on my way back through the kitchen.   Takes me 5 minutes to do the entire cage.  We aren’t talking about a small cage either. It’s all about routine.  Get faster as you go.  The more often you clean it the easier it is to clean each time.

Kids? Playrooms?

Come on… lets get ready for the Holidays. Time to get up and clean out those playrooms. Rid yourself of the chaos now BEFORE Santa comes. Toss a ton of toys. Give them to Freecycle.. OR just toss in the garbage. I’m into being “green” but come on.. if you just say your going to give them or people don’t show up, what will you do? You need to really get it out of your house.. You’ll feel so much better.

Get ready toy toss!!!!! How much can you toss?

Election Time.. Clean up!

Time to do some self cleaning..  Wipe out any negative feelings you have toward either candidate because you really have no clue who is going to win.

There are a few more hours left to vote, and even though Obama appears to be winning, you really have no idea.  If you have ill feelings clean them out now, cause if you’ve voted you’ve done all you can do and now it’s up to the rest of the world.

I heard it was the biggest election participation ever.  Who did I vote for?! Hrmmmmmmm I voted is all I can say.

Get rid of mothballs smell in closet

I had a closet in my boyfriends house full of the mothball smell.. YUCK! I opened it up, aired it out, and had to clean it completely out.. I had to take all the clothes out, wash them, etc… I vacuumed out the closet, and then hung a deodorizer in there. After 4 days, it’s just NOW removing that awwful smell of mothballs

Declutter time

Take time to toss 30 things today. You will feel so much better when you remove clutter from your home. If you haven’t used it touched it or don’t have a place for it, file it in the garbage. Really!! Take this time for yourself and just get rid of it.

Your house will look and feel better too! Just do it for yourself today! Get ready for the Holidays.. Get ready for thanksgiving! Do it now.